YACK on: The last 50
Grant Sanders
For those of you who missed it, here's a rundown of the last fifty threads on YACKon.com spanning the discussions of the last two weeks. For the uninitiated, a thread on a forum like YACKon.com is a single discussion that starts on a particular topic and often veers wildly off topic until it comes to a stop like a foul ball off the

stick of Ernie Els. (I think I got the sports analogy right there. I'm not really a fan of tennis.) Some threads are long and go on for days. Some contain only a few words. It just depends upon how provocative the initial post is and how "out there" the replies are. (The bold type below is the subject of each thread):

1. Cape Woodchuck. A self-aggrandizing thread, started by me to point out how witty and timely my column in The Nantucket Independent was two weeks ago.

2. What makes Nantucketers happy? Another thread started by me after I wrote my column last week. Look for another shameless self promotion when this column is posted online.

3. SSA and Hy-Line. A thread about the Hy-Line contract with the Steamship Authority. Seems reasonable to me. Except for the part about being allowed to drag unruly passengers behind the high-speed catamaran in a leaky dinghy.

4. Hate Month (with humor). How can Hate Month be funny?

5. Turkington will not run again. A very short thread about our state rep deciding not to seek re-election.

6. New trash inspections at the landfill. A complaint-laden thread about how the people at the landfill have gotten more and more militant about looking at your trash and recycling before you throw it away even though it all ends up in the same place heaped together after you toss it down those chutes.

7. Bicycle Helmet Law. A thread begun by a YACKer who did not know the helmet law was repealed at Town Meeting two years ago. He argued brilliantly and decisively against the law. I hope he's happy.

8. Political Pecking Order Poll. A poll and discussion about who should be who's running mate, Hillary Clinton or Barack Obama. I'm still holding out for Morgan Freedman to make a surprise entry into the race after rumors surface of a giant comet that will strike the earth in 4 years.

9. Nantucket Flying Association. An announcement placed on YACK by the Nantucket Flying Association. Such announcements are free to add to the events and announcements section of the site. 10. Beach Permits? A YACKer asking a question about beach permits and how to obtain them. I make my own with my ink-jet printer and my Mac. It's far more cost effective.

11. Increase in water pressure? A YACKer asking anyone else if the pressure in the house had increased to the point where the shower spray was dislodging ceramic tiles from the opposite side of the shower stall. No one could say the same.

12. Does Reis Land Swap make sense? This is a very interesting thread in which several people have posted lots of information on this subject, and I have to say, I learned a lot. This thread also contains several informative posts by Brian Chadwick who is back on YACKon.com - I am happy to say - after a hiatus of two years, and who, coincidentally, or not, is running for re-election to the Board of Selectmen in April.

13. Jet Blue. A discussion of the air carrier and their spotty service to Nantucket.

14. Dolphins. The thread containing a discussion of the pair of juvenile dolphins at Hither Creek, one of which died. There was a lot of sympathy and caring and an outpouring of good sentiments for this dolphin.

15. Hy-Line Grey Lady Maintenance. A short service announcement from the Hy-Line.

16. SOS Poster at Airport. I was irked to find that the airport, a town-owned and run entity, was allowing the display of a political sign within the terminal protesting the construction of the Cape Wind project. I think the management of the airport needs to be seriously looked at. Anyone who would allow advertising in the terminals without the town receiving some remuneration is clearly not a very good manager.

17. '80s and early '90s music. Adiscussion of this genre of music. The Thompson Twins were not mentioned at all.

18. Electric Bill. An interesting discussion about our electric bill and how a full 40 percent to 70 percent of one's bill can be made up of tacked-on fees and service charges while the actual cost of electricity is quite low.

19. Planning on starting a new map company. A YACKer discusses his proposed map company while others discuss how Google and Mapquest are changing the way we use maps. I find my iPhone is the only map I need.

20. Change your clock - change your smoke detector / CO detector batteries. Ahelpful safety reminder posted on Saturday.

21. 2 FGR. A short discussion of the 2 Fairgrounds Road complex and whether we can afford to build it.

22. Harbor Plan a step forward? This discussion began after the Planning Board voted 4-1 to allow one Nantucket resident to essentially buy their way out of a zoning change (the Harbor Overlay District) by offering the town the right of first refusal on a property that is not for sale and likely will be something the town will vote not to buy anyway in the far-flung future, because it can barely afford to run itself now and as we all know the Deathstar* is looming. Hopefully someone will make a motion at town meeting to put this property back in the harbor district. Or to simply take the property by public domain. That would be cool.

23. Zoning Woes. A hard-to-follow discussion of zoning.

24. That's no moon: the death star is fully operational. *I told you! (This is a collection of links to stories on economic issues.)

25. Texas doesn't blow: loss of wind causes power grid emergency. A story posted to try to show that wind power is bad. It's not.

26. This house was a steal. Another link to another story about a shady real estate deal.

27. Looking for recipe. Someone who was in search of a specific oatmeal cookie recipe. We tried to help.

28. Clearing out my bookmarks: odds and ends from the Web. Just what is says. From our excellent and witty Off-Topic Forum Moderator.

29. Constable expected to plead guilty. A news story about an alleged child porn suspect from Nantucket.

30. Help out your neighbor: park illegally. An interesting idea that would allow a portion of a parking ticket to be paid to charity at the offender's request. Hmmm…

31. Rick Atherton 20- and 30-something meet-up at Pi Pizza. Another announcement of a political event happening Saturday, March 16.

32. The Shingles in concert at the Atheneum Sat. A similar announcement posted on the site. They're free, you know.

33. Gary Gygax fails his last saving throw. The inventor of Dungeons and Dragons passes away.

34. Change Your Time Zone Today. Another helpful reminder.

35. Bantams make waves in the mountains. A story of Nantucket Youth Hockey triumphs.

36. Alice's (formerly Hutch's). Free advertising for a local restaurant. I keep meaning to lock this thread.

37. Yick Photos of deer on YACK…YUCK? I have no idea what this is. Contains photos of a disturbing nature.

38. Threats against the school system? A thread that shows YACK at its worst, in which people make statements that are hurtful, harmful and just plain ignorant. And I struggle to keep it from going out of control. I finally had to lock this thread and threaten everyone with shutting down the site entirely. Apparently, as a community, we have more compassion for juvenile dolphins than for teen humans.

39. Loose dogs. A perennial discussion favorite in which people complain about their neighbor's dog. Did I mention it's March?

40. Top Iraq Contractor Skirts US Taxes Off Shore. Another posted news event meant to rile up the Republicans.

41. To bag or not to bag. That is the question. A Hate Month classic in which YACKers complain about having to bag their own groceries at the Stop&Shop. Hilarious.

42. March Roars in. Our local weather expert gives predictions and comments for the month.

43. Love the home page picture. It's me. In front of the silly Save Our Sound (SSOS) poster at the airport.

44. Whirligigs. A discussion of whirligigs. I really have no idea why.

45. Katherine Wheatley Live at the Nantucket New School. Another announcement.

46. Has the Deathstar Landed? * A long and informative discussion of the Nantucket economic picture. Long on problems. Somewhat lacking in solutions, but some excellent thoughts. Deathstars cannot actually land, by the way. But they can explode suddenly.

47. The Sheriff in the news again. A note and discussion on a Cape Cod Times story on the Sheriff.

48. Got Wind? A thread laden with fart jokes. Not really my cup of tea. But some people seem to enjoy them.

49. David Barham for HDC? A YACKer asks, Who is David Barham? I'm sure we will find out.

50. School Budget to be slashed today. Along thread full of fear, uncertainty and doubt about the state of our schools, special education and funding. Many are worried that our kids'needs will not be met. This is a thorny issue. And no matter what happens, someone is always going to get upset. But with three people running for two school committee seats this year, I'm sure this thread will continue for some time.

That's it. All fifty threads. Now you won't have to read YACKon.com for a week and a half at least.

YACK on. I

Grant Sanders is the host of YACK, the Nantucket Online Community at yackon.com and it's his job to read every thread and kick people off the site when they misbehave. Mwahahaha. His views are his own and do not reflect the editorial stance of The Nantucket Independent. Or his wife.