LESSONS FOR LIFE

This is the third column in a series of six. Much of the information in this series is from the nonprofit research organization HeartMath® (www.heartmath.com). Research on trauma and the heart is the basis of stress reduction techniques taught in Dr. Robert Macy's trauma response certification course in psychological first aid (a course recognized by the International Red Cross).

Anyone who has had an injury or surgery has been asked what her pain level is on a scale of one-to- 10, with 10 being the "greatest pain ever." This measurement applies to emotional pain, too, and sometimes emotional suffering reaches the top of the scale.

The more often we experience overwhelming events that push us to the top of that scale, the more difficult it becomes to cope effectively with the day-today challenges of life. The self-calming and stressreduction techniques described in the first columns in this series, "ease," the "power of neutral," and "heart appreciation," all using "heart-breathing," are useful in managing the anxiety that emerges after overwhelming events.

But there's something basic, and incredibly helpful, that isn't a "technique" and can't be learned from a book (or newspaper article). Yet it's necessary - essential - if we are to have meaningful, fulfilling lives and recover from events that have shaken us to the core.

Playfulness.

Yes, playfulness is vital.

There are lots of things people can choose that make their lives meaningful. "Playfulness" rarely makes the list. Yet the times we spend sharing pleasure and laughter with the people we care about are the moments that we remember, that we appreciate, when we look back.

So, on a scale of one-to-10, think about a single day's playful and pleasurable moments. How do they rate? Seek out above-average "pleasure and playfulness" every day, even if only for a few moments.

Another way to think about it - and maybe the most reliable yardstick - is to find a way to laugh every day. Nose-to-the-grindstone, dinner-on-thetable: Okay, fine. But we all deserve a few minutes of laugher with the human beings who are closest to us. Seek opportunities for laughter (a "ten" if possible).

Have you had your daily dose of laughter today?

- Rev Jennifer Brooks Unitarian Universalist Church, Nantucket