BY DANIEL W. DRAKE ASSOCIATE PUBLISHER
"It's cold," squawked Hawkeye at me when I went outside on Sunday morning.

"You're darn tootin' it's cold" I answered. "Spring is a myth on Nantucket. It is supposed to start on Tuesday but in reality, it won't be here until the middle of June."

"Well……well," Hawkeye retorted, "That's not quite true. Didn't your friend, the one who writes the bird column, send you a photograph of those two birds in Central Park doing what comes naturally?"

"Yes, he did," I said warily, as I had no idea where the conversation was going. Despite my rising concern, somehow I couldn't resist adding, "It was quite a picture. Those two birds could not have been any closer. The air traffic controllers must have been worried."

"Now you are making fun of me." Hawkeye glared down his beak at me. "Anyhow, while I don't begrudge those New York birds their notoriety, my only point is that I am certainly not going to let them keep spring for themselves. And, if the truth be known, my spring has already started."

Trying desperately to change the subject, I said "We haven't seen any sign of any nesting activity in that big old pine tree where you were the last couple of years. What's happened?"

"That was just a starter house, and it rocked and rolled in some of those April storms. We decided it was time to move on, so we found a new place that's a lot more protected. By the way, if you think I am going to tell you where the new place is, think again. There is no way we are going to allow you to climb up the tree looking for Easter eggs the way you tried to last year."

"Hey," the hawk continued, "I would really like to talk about your spring."

"My spring? After all the activity this winter," I said, "I hope to have an uneventful spring."

Hawkeye answered, "I meant the human spring; the rising of the sap in the body politic; the time of year when all you folks get all worked up about candidates and issues. That's a sure sign of spring. You even started getting into it last week."

"I know, but I have to," I answered. "Election Day is only two weeks off, April 3. And Town Meeting is the following week. The elections for the two selectmen' seats are going to be very interesting, but the real noise is going to be at Town Meeting. I haven't spoken to the Moderator to get her opinion on the subject, but I will predict that it is going to go on for four nights. If she can bring it in in three, she will certainly get a gold star. If it lasts only two nights she will get my - and several hundred other people's - eternal gratitude and a permanent place in the pantheon of Moderators. Beyond that, I will recommend her for a raise, although, the way people pay attention to me, I suspect she will have to settle for greater glory."

"Four nights is a marathon. You could starve!" Hawkeye gasped. "I wouldn't wish either a marathon or starvation on anyone - well, except someone who loves zoning."

"You have it just right," I said. "But it isn't just zoning this year, even though there are lots of zoning articles. The contentious issues run the gamut from sewer connections to the preservation of the interiors (or some - unclear - part thereof ) of historic structures; from diverting the Land Bank's revenues for affordable housing to setting up a Housing Bank in which to put all the Land Bank's money."

"I don't think you have that quite right," Hawkeye interjected.

"Probably not, but you can certainly see why people are confused," I said. "When they are confused, they talk a lot at Town Meeting. And then, there are the people who think everyone else is confused and they are the ones who talk even more.

"And when you do get to the zoning articles themselves, there are some related to the Master Plan and others related to the Harbor Plan. Then, there are the special interest articles. The zoning articles are complicated and people get all excited when they talk about them. And pious esthetes in sackcloth and ashes have nothing on people who think they have a God-given right to spot zoning."

"Why do you subject yourself to this"? Hawkeye asked. "By "you" I mean the royal you, the electorate. Aren't there better things to do than sit around at Town Meeting being miserable? You could be home having a quiet dinner or reading "Goodnight Moon" to the children before bed. You could have representatives to do that work for you; there are enough people who thrive on that stuff."

"The reason, I am told, that we do it the way we do is because it is the will of the people," I replied. "Maybe it is the will of the people because they can tune it out whenever they want. You can see that more and more of them leave Town Meeting as the slogging gets rougher. Or maybe it is the will of the people…. Never mind. But that subject is the perfect introduction to the Town Government Study Committee articles."

"Enough," Hawkeye barked. "You have second guessed that poor group enough. Let them be."

"I only wanted to point out," I said, meekly, "that they have nine articles in the Warrant and the discussions about those are going to be very long as well. And for all that, we have to go through the same thing next year. Nothing really is changing."

"Well, you have to have patience with the process, just like I do when I am looking for prey," Hawkeye pronounced. "In time, as the saying goes, good things come to those who wait. And, by the way, I am sorry I got you going on all this. Talking about my spring is much more fun."

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The "Lighthouse Keeper" reflects the views of the author and does not necessarily represent the editorial position of The Nantucket Independent. Please send any ideas or comments to drake@nantucketindependent. com.