I LOVE MY MAMA
Our son e-mailed me a video I refer to as "I Love My Mama." If you want to have a really good laugh, just log onto talkingdogs. wmv and scroll down the list. In the video's several clips, a person, usually off camera, coaches their dog to "say" different phrases. Adorable and funny, my personal favorites are a boxer and a little terrier who each proclaim through barks and whines, "I LOVE my Mama!"

If our dog Junior could talk, I'm sure he would say "I love my Mama!" too. Junior adores me. He's always been a Mama's boy. I know he loves me because of the way he behaves towards me. I'm the one he gets the goofiest over when we have been away. I'm the one he saves his very special snuggle for; when I hug him, he tucks his head under my chin so I can lay my face into that delicious deep cleft between his eyes. He stands stock still with his eyes closed and will remain motionless, barely breathing, just enjoying our closeness, until I break the spell by moving or he needs some air. And I'm the one who gets his toothiest grins.

That's not to say Junior doesn't have plenty of love left over for other people, too. He loves our other family members and friends. Daughter Linda, who is Junior's caregiver when we are away, believes that Junior loves her because he thinks of her as a surrogate me. "He will follow me everywhere and he's friendly if given attention. But everyone else is just sub-standard if you're not around!"

Husband Fred thinks dogs feel love because they are really happy to see you. They feel love but they can discriminate with their affections; they are not always happy to see everyone. He also thinks love is in the eye of the beholder. Junior, as mentioned, is a grinner. We know that, and wait for that wonderful grin that signals his unbridled joy, which sends us into peals of laughter and elicits gushy responses. To the uninitiated, however, a dog baring his teeth is not a welcome sight.

Do you think that dogs can love? Experts argue both ways, but in my own small, unquantified, unscientific and highly biased sampling of family and friends, the opinions totally favor love as a very real and compelling dog emotion.

My friend Sue has three dogs, all rescued English Setters. "When I think of dogs feeling love, I have to think of my little Maggie, because with her it is so clear," she says. "The tail wags this dog, quite literally. When I come home, she runs to the door and twirls in joyous circles - it just slays me! Her eyes hold mine and I know her devotion to me is unequivocal. This love is not a complicated thing; it has nothing to do with intelligence. Maggie was badly abused and yet that experience hasn't jaded her or compromised her relationship with me."

Whether or not dogs love us as we define love, it is clear we certainly do love our dogs. Dog behaviorist and author Patricia B. McConnell, PhD, has written a book, For the Love of a Dog, which explores the nature of our extraordinary love affair with dogs. She offers several possibilities as to why we have become so smitten with our four-legged friends.

First, as unromantic as it sounds, there is a biological component to love. The hormones oxytocin and dopamine, present in varying degrees in all mammals, play a role in all types of love, whether familial, romantic or sexual. It should come as no surprise that women have higher levels of oxytocin than men, given their traditional roles of childbirth and motherhood. But the fact that levels of this hormone can vary by individual might explain why some people, and some dogs, appear to be more nurturing and caring than others

It has been pointed out that men love dogs because they can't ask them to talk about their feelings, while women love dogs because they view their pets as being supportive. We all recognize that dogs give us unconditional love and nonjudgmental approval. But there are other reasons why this relationship has evolved.

Whatever a dog is thinking shows up on its expressive face, without guile or pretense. Their moods are contagious and make a direct connection into our basic emotional receptors. Most dogs are sociable in a way that is comfortable for us humans. They seek companionship and the claniness of their pack. They communicate with us in a way we can understand, no doubt benefiting from being nonverbal.

And finally, we have an innate response to be protective and nurturing to dependent young mammals with limited abilities. We need to be needed. We love our pets like children and they love us back with a simple, primal love that makes us feel good about ourselves. Whatever the reasons, it's a winwin

situation. I

Jan Jaeger is owner of Geronimo's, Ltd., Nantucket's pet supply and gift shop and is a member of Dog and Cat Writer's Associations of America (DWAA and CWA).. Her pets at home are Junior, a Chesapeake Bay Retriever and three cats. At the shop are the cats, Messrs. Fish and Chips, Flower Bunny, Millie guinea pig and two budgies. Send e-mail to jan@geronimos.com.