Survey Says: The Undergraduates want you to crack a smile
BY MARLI GUZZETTA
Pink Floyd had "The Wizard of Oz." Nantucket's new melodic synthrock band The Undergraduates has 1982's "Workout starring Jane Fonda."

Newly formed synthrock band The Undergraduates will spread peace and prosperity to all the peoples of Cambridge Street Victuals. From left: Beau Barber, Ted Lothian and Josh Lothian.

Last spring, a few boys from the Rontiki musical collective empowered the VHS, circled the chairs and grabbed their instruments to compose the 13 tracks of their new album, "Good Evening, Senator" - which, more often than not, syncs up perfectly with Jane Fonda's leg-warmers. (You can try it yourself at home.)

It was thus, from the shapely legs of Jane Fonda, that The Undergraduates sprang forth. Their sound is like a "country rock band stuck in a video game," according to frontman Ted Lothian, a.k.a "Randy Paradise," who said he would play nothing but Keith Urban covers if his bandmates would let him.

The Undergraduates performed their first live show at Cambridge Street two weeks ago. It was a raucous, melodic brouhaha. Frontman Ted was going for much of the gusto - sneering into his beer, strutting with camp rock Iggy Pop-ishness and, when bending over to work the synthesizer, giving the rapt audience a flash of his self-titled "Madaket Smile."

(While the Rontiki Website, www.rontiki.com, claims that its members were "born under a dark moon," The Undergraduates seem eager to live under a full one: Ted, who double majored in anthropology and music at the University of Vermont, favors low-riding jeans and defies the augury of underwear.)

In short, the show was a spot-on good time by the homegrowns from Rontiki, which is kind of like Canada's Arts and Crafts/Broken Social Scene collective, except without all the mainstream press.

The guys are all Nantucket natives who've known each other since recess and naptime. Guitarist and carpenter Josh Lothian remembers an era when NHS classes were barely 80 kids deep. Guitarist and fine furniture craftsman Beau Barber remembers the video that Josh turned in for his (successful!) campaign for eighth-grade class president - lights up on a young boy sitting by the fire, tossing a football like a sports hero, reminiscing about his youth.

"It was a media blitz, because none of the other candidates had videos," Beau said.

If you want a copy of the video, you have to talk to Josh, who is happy to discuss the superiority of "Hell's Kitchen" over "Top Chef."

If you want a copy of the album, take your money someplace else - it's no good with Team Undergrad, which is happy to burn you a copy of their CD, and maybe a copy of their mini movie. (Good etiquette warrants an equal trade, like $1 to cover the costs of production, or a mix CD or a beer.)

If you want to see them live, you'll have to catch them at Cambridge Street. "We serve at the pleasure of Trish and Megan and all those guys. When they want us to come play, we play there," Josh said.

In the meantime, we all need to know more about them. We want to ask them deep and meaningful questions, and we will in a second. Just after we give a proper introduction.

Ladies and gentlemen, The Undergraduates are: Ted Lothian (vocals, synths, taxi driver), Beau Barber (guitar, furniture designer), Josh Lothian (guitar, carpenter), Davey Holcomb (guitar), Dan Seitz (guitar), Eric Playe (manager and nutritionist), Will Sulzer (Webmaster and motivational speaker).
    And these are some of their truths.
What were you doing at midnight
last night?
Josh: Karaoke at the Rose and Crown.
Ted: Tossing and turning.
Beau: Emailing an overseas customer.
What is the last text message on
your cell phone?
Ted: It's from [artist] Hannah [Stone], about the
show. She wanted us to do a cover of a Billy Idol
tune.
If you were an item of clothing what
would you be? Josh: Socks. Ted: Lederhosen. Beau: A girdle.

What is your favorite album of all time, ever? Ted: "The Idiot." Iggy Pop. Beau: Danzig. "Danzig." Josh: Anything by Joy Division.

If you had a superpower, what would it be? Josh: I'd go with flight. Ted: I'd be able to catch cats. ...No, wait. To be able to hold monkeys without freaking out. Beau: Invisibility would be pretty cool.

Me: I go back and forth between invisibility and mind reading.)

Josh (to Beau): No, but wait. But remember the childhood dream of soaring against the clouds?

Ted: But it would get old, because you would get used to it.

Josh: You would be so perverted if you had invisibility, though. ... It's too tempting.

Beau: Yeah, but if you're invisible, you'd know all the dirty things ... Josh: That's what I'm saying. It's too dark. Beau: It would be all right. Josh: What about the ability to see the future? All: No. Josh: Yeah, you'd be able to see just far enough to get yourself into trouble.

Beau: You'd be like Muadib from "Dune." Insert prolonged tangent on "Dune," David

Lynch, "Twin Peaks," Lara Flynne Boyle, "Sex and the City" and "Desperate Housewives," which Josh called 'Twin Peaks' Light.)

You have to pick one. Blind or deaf? Ted: That's too hard to answer. Dumb. Beau: Deaf. You don't have to listen to people if you're deaf ... my grandfather's deaf. But it's selective hearing. He's deaf when he's talking to his wife. Josh: Deaf.

What's the last furry thing you touched? Ted: My behind. Josh: My cat. ...What? I'm serious. I love my cat. Beau: My buddy Sam shot a deer the other day. And I had to pull it back out of the woods. He wants me to gut it now, but I'm not gonna do it.

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